4 Simple Steps to a New Perspective & Better Attitude

Recently I had to take on a new responsibility that I was not very pleased with. Actually, I had a bad attitude about it. Once I realized that nothing was going to change unless I did, I decided to change my perspective. I thought about this quote: 

I can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses. It's all how you look at it. J. Kenfield Morley

I decided that I was not going to complain, but instead, I was going to do something about it. This is what I chose to do and it has given me a new and positive perspective:

1. Stop dwelling on what we do not like or wish was different.  Focusing on everything wrong and frustrating about a situation quickly leads to complaining.  We can refocus.

2. Accept what we cannot change. When there is nothing we can do to change things, there is no point in getting all upset.  It only drains our energy which can be better used in finding healthy ways to cope.

3. Change what we can change.  Our actions, attitude, and perspective are all in our control.  When we begin to look at the good things in an unpleasant situation, we may be surprised that we are able to identify some benefits.

4. Choose to have a good attitude.  A good attitude keeps us from focusing on what we do not like or want. Instead, we can think about how we can make the best of the situation and deal with it better. We may find that we can still be happy even when things do not go our way. And, we do not have to give in to feelings of frustration and discontentment.


The power of perspective is amazing. It can completely change our attitude and mood. We have the freedom to choose what we think and focus on. I hope this reminds you to see the good in today.


Today is a New Day and it is good, Krystal

For more on perspective, check out this fun page:
Practice Happiness with a New Perspective


 Just for today, no matter where I am going, or what I am doing, or who I am doing it with, it is my intention to focus on the positive. ~Lucy MacDonald

Copyright © 2007 BeHappy4Life.com. All Rights Reserved





Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a professional counselor, author, teacher & musician. She is the cofounder of New Day Counseling, a family marriage counseling & individual and couples counseling center and BeHappy4Life.com, an award-winning, self-help and inspirational site where you can find hundreds of free resources, insights & inspiration.


The BeHappy4Life mission is to empower people to develop a lifestyle of health, happiness & love with self-help tools, activities, resources, insights & inspiration that will change your life.



New Day Counseling provides professional counseling services for individuals, couples, and the entire family. We specialize in all areas of mental health and well-being including depression counseling, anxiety counseling, alcohol addiction counseling, eating addictions, substance and sexual abuse, porn addiction counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling. We also offer anger counseling groups and parenting classes. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.



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How to Find Peace in a World of "Why?"

Pain and suffering are a part of the human experience. No one is exempt. Tragedies occur leaving us in shock and devastation. Diseases weaken and destroy bodies. The innocent are abused and exploited. Families are broken and hearts are shattered. Losses leave us to grieve and cry out from the depths of our souls, Why? This question is so often directed to the only One who knows the answer. We plead for God to help us to understand. We want to know why He allows people to hurt so badly and suffer unjustly.

Not understanding why people must suffer is the reason many people question the love and sovereignty of God. They reason, “How can a loving God allow such evil? Being all-powerful He could easily stop it if He really cared.” Yet, their questions go unanswered and some deny God or pull away from Him. Sometimes it is for a season and sometimes it is for a lifetime.

Pain and suffering do not have to keep us from seeking God and going to Him with all  of our questions, confusion, pain, and anger. He knows how we feel and what we think. He understands what we are going through. When bad things happen, it does not mean that He is no longer with us or present in our situation. It does not mean He loves us any less or that He doesn’t care. However, it can be very difficult to believe this when we are hurting so badly. But nothing can ever change who God is. He is good no matter what happens. His plans for us are good regardless of how things might appear.

Nothing can ever keep us from His love and grace. They never cease. Only we can keep ourselves from receiving His love and grace. He wants us to know Him and all He has for us. That is why He invites us to draw near to Him and allow Him to draw near to us. He will give us so much more than the answers we think we need. He will give us His love that endures forever. He will give us His peace and will calm our minds. He will comfort our hearts and hold us up. He will be gracious and merciful to us. He will give us beauty for ashes. He will turn our mourning into dancing.

If you have ever asked Why? in the midst of circumstances that are beyond your understanding, you are not alone. When there is no answer or reasonable explanation, the way you handle it will determine how it changes you. You can choose to trust that God is still good, that He restores and comforts, brings healing and inner peace, and helps us learn and grow in the midst of pain and suffering. And most of all, that He is the answer to all that we seek.


Though our feelings come and go, God’s love for us does not. ~ C.S. Lewis

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning. ~ Lamentations

If it were not for hopes, the heart would break. ~Thomas Fuller

We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope.  ~Martin Luther King

My job is to take care of the possible and trust God with the impossible. ~unknown

Sorrow looks back, worry looks around, faith looks up. ~unknown

Worry is a total waste of time. It doesn't change anything.  All it does is taint your mind and steals your joy. You can't have joy without peace, and there is no peace without God. ~unknown




How to Find Peace in a World of "Why?" written by Krystal Kuehn

Copyright © 2007 BeHappy4Life.com. All Rights Reserved







Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a psychotherapist, author, teacher & musician. She is the cofounder of New Day Counseling, a family marriage counseling & individual and couples counseling center and BeHappy4Life.com, an award-winning, self-help and inspirational site where you can find hundreds of free resources, insights & inspiration.



The BeHappy4Life mission is to empower people to develop a lifestyle of health, happiness & love with self-help tools, activities, resources, insights & inspiration that will change your life.



New Day Counseling provides professional counseling services for individuals, couples, and the entire family. We specialize in all areas of mental health and well-being including depression counseling, anxiety counseling, alcohol addiction counseling, eating addictions, substance and sexual abuse, porn addiction counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling. We also offer anger counseling groups and parenting classes. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.



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Opportunity - Do We Wait for It to Knock?

What is opportunity, and when does it knock? It never knocks. You can wait a whole lifetime, listening and hoping, and you will hear no knocking. None at all. You are opportunity, and you must knock on the door leading to your destiny. You prepare yourself to recognize opportunity, to pursue and seize opportunity as you develop the strength of your personality and build a self-image with which you are able to live. ~Maxwell Maltz

Sometimes people wait their entire lives for the right doors to open for them.  They wait passively hoping and wishing something will change. Out of the blue, things will turn around for them. They are good people.  They deserve it.  Maybe they had some bad breaks, but some day good fortune might suddenly fall into their laps.  They just might get lucky, but until then their choices and inaction keep them in a discontented place.  They wish they could have the success that others have.  They can only imagine how nice it must be to have the opportunities others have.  Very rarely, however, do they consider the cost of hard work, strong faith, determination, and persistance.

Most people who are successful in life have paid their dues.  I am talking about truly successful people, not those who have things handed to them and do very little with their opportunities.  Although there is nothing wrong with someone getting a good break because of a connection, that person will only experience the rewards of success when validated for their own efforts, investment, and talent.  Until then, he or she may not feel too successful regardless of how they appear to others.  They too want to know the rewards and self-confidence that come from growing, giving, and fulfilling your destiny.

The good news is that we do not have to wait for opportunity to knock.  We can recognize opportunity, pursue it, and seize it.  We can start knocking on doors right now.  We can take steps to move forward, change, improve, and fulfill our destiny.  We can develop and practice successful habits today!!   What are you waiting for?

Empowering Thoughts & Words of Wisdom:
A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds. ~Francois Bacon

Opportunities? They are all around us.  There is power lying latent everywhere waiting for the observant eye to discover it. ~Orison Swett Marden

It's the man who waits for his ship to come in who's always missing the boat. ~Anonymous

Many an opportunity is lost because a man is out looking for four-leaf clovers. ~Anonymous

The trouble with opportunity is that it always comes disguised as hard work. ~Anonymous

Everyone has a fair turn to be as great as he pleases. ~Jeremy Collier

Your big opportunity may be right where you are now. ~Napoleon Hill

Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity. ~Lucius Annaeus Seneca




Copyright 2011 All Rights Reserved. Written by Krystal Kuehn.
Co-founder of New Day Family Marriage Counseling & BeHappy4Life.com




Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a psychotherapist, author, teacher & musician. She is the cofounder of New Day Counseling, a family marriage counseling & individual and couples therapy center and BeHappy4Life.com, an award-winning, self-help and inspirational site where you can find hundreds of free resources, insights & inspiration.


The BeHappy4Life mission is to empower people to develop a lifestyle of health, happiness & love with self-help tools, activities, resources, insights & inspiration that will change your life.


New Day Counseling provides professional counseling services for individuals, couples, and the entire family. We specialize in all areas of mental health and well-being including depression counseling, anxiety counseling, alcohol addiction counseling, eating addictions, substance and sexual abuse, porn addiction counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling. We also offer anger counseling groups and parenting classes. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.






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How is Happiness Contagious?

We have heard that laughter is contagious, but did you know that happiness is contagious as well? I just read about a 20 year research study that showed a person is 15 percent more likely to be happy if they have a close friend or family member that is happy. It also showed that happy people tend to stick together. This makes perfect sense. I notice that the more I commit to being the best I can be and living a lifestyle of true happiness, the more I am drawn to positive and happy people. It is so nice to be around optimistic people with a good attitude.

Were you ever around someone who points out what is wrong with everything and everyone, gives reasons to worry and fear, and complains about how unfair life is? Or, someone who tells you why you should give up on your goals and dreams because you don’t have what it takes. Negative people can put fear and pessimism in you if you let them. It can be difficult being around them because they tend to create a negative atmosphere as they focus on everything they don't like or that is wrong. Just as happiness and a positive outlook are contagious, so is negativity. It is no wonder that happy, positive people stick together. They try to avoid negative influences because they know how destructive and hopeless they can be.

Positive and happy people are like lights in the world. They brighten our days and bring encouragement and hope wherever they go. I am so thankful for people with positive outlooks. They remind me that life is good. They remind me to enjoy life, laugh more often, appreciate my blessings, believe for the best, trust God, stay full of faith and hope and give thanks always. Being a positive, happy person is a lifestyle. We can develop the habit of being optimistic as I describe in The 9 Habits of Happy People. I am thankful that I can be positive, hopeful, and happy, and make it a habit for life!


A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes.  ~Hugh Downs


Happiness is contagious...when you reflect happiness, then all others around you catch the happy bug and are happy, too. ~Jennifer Leese

Happiness is contagious, spreading to friends and neighbors like a virus. You can give the gift of happiness just by being happy yourself.  ~Susan McMillin






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Copyright 2010 All Rights Reserved. Written by Krystal Kuehn.
New Day Family Marriage Counseling & BeHappy4Life.com





Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a psychotherapist, author, teacher & musician. She is the cofounder of New Day Counseling, a family marriage counseling & individual and couples counseling center and BeHappy4Life.com, an award-winning, self-help and inspirational site where you can find hundreds of free resources, insights & inspiration.


The BeHappy4Life mission is to empower people to develop a lifestyle of health, happiness & love with self-help tools, activities, resources, insights & inspiration that will change your life.



New Day Family Counseling provides professional counseling services for individuals, couples, and the entire family. We specialize in all areas of mental health and well-being including depression counseling, anxiety counseling, alcohol, shopping, eating addictions, substance and sexual abuse, transitions, stress, divorce.  We also offer anger classes and parenting classes. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.

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